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‘Believe In Amazing’-An Early Jump on Resolutions

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When you have confidence, you can have a lot of fun. And when you have fun, you can do amazing things.

Joe Namath

Ok everyone it is getting close to the time for a New Year’s resolution brain shift.  I personally am going to change my outlook on a few things and I wanted to share them with you.  I hope these resonate with you, will inspire you to think a little bit differently.

First if your number one New Year’s Resolution for 2019 is to lose weight, toss that one is out the window!  Think BIGGER, think-

When we start to ‘Believe in Amazing’ weight loss is not our primary goal.  And since only 8% of people are actually successful at their resolutions, we need a paradigm shift anyway.  Now we focus on our how we feel, so to ‘Believe in Amazing’ for 2019 the goal is to focus on ‘ESPM’, keeping it all simple.

  1. Eat a few more whole foods and less processed or fast food

  2. Sleep better, rejuvenate, rest

  3. Poop regularly (hey go with me here ok)

  4. Move more (anything you like that involves movement, do more of it) this certainly will help with pooping!

I love the mindset of ‘Well-Being’. Wellness is great, but in our live presentations I have the ‘Well-Being Paradigm’ and the ‘Fantastic Five’ components, which include-

  1. Wellness and its eight dimensions consisting of the-

    • Physical & Intellectual

    • Occupational & Financial

    • Emotional & Spiritual

    • Social & Environmental       

  2. Technologies- All the cool stuff that the 21st century has to offer

  3. Science-  Think about ‘Epigenetics’ or ‘The Human Genome’, ever heard of “23 and Me”?

  4. Medicine – Hyper Personalized and very, very specific to you

  5. Behaviors – Why we think the way we do and do the things we think.  Habits, yes it is all about developing a system.

Our goals are to just feel great and do the small things that will help us get there.  47% of people make a resolution with self improvement and or educational related resolutions.  I love this and its fabulous!

Will you be one of the 47%?

With our new emphasis on ‘Believing in Amazing’ and incremental change, (smaller goals are achievable goals) we are going to change the way we think about the New Year and the new you and me.

I love the thought of ‘Incremental Self-Improvement’ and ‘Educational’ resolutions!

A large number of people, 38%, make weight related resolutions.  Hey don’t get me wrong about this goal, I embrace and encourage everyone to think positive. Just reframe our resolution goals to ‘Believe Amazing’ and  weight loss becomes the lead into feeling better, living longer and just enjoying your hard earned achievements.

Try these-

  • Spend more time with positive people
  • Help others
  • Share knowledge with our children and young people
  • Be a leader
  • Think and ‘Believe in Amazing’ because you are!

peace

Source- http://www.statisticbrain.com/new-years-resolution-statistics/

The Making of a Super Hero

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We raise our children to be pillars of society, those stalwarts that stand the test of time.  Like Luke Cage we hope for the best as Mike Colter shares in this excerpt from Emma Brown’s article–

“Luke is one of the more redeeming characters that I’ve played,” explains actor Mike Colter, star of Netflix’s new superhero drama Luke Cage. “He has his issues, but for the most part he’s a no-B.S. kind of character. He’s a straightforward kind of guy, and he doesn’t take a lot of nonsense, doesn’t suffer fools,” he continues. “I think there’s a lot of places we can go with him and I hope to develop him even more.”

As we grew up, and believe me we watched a ton of television, (remember way pre Internet) we had Adam West as the “Wham-Bop-Crunch” man of almost steel-

Or going way back in the day we had George Reeves as the television ‘Man of Steel’ (black and white version) Superman-

We had of all people Bill Bixby-

Seriously, Bill portrayed Bruce Banner playing the Incredible Hulk on the television series from 1977-82 (yep five years) national television.

Well of course everyone remembers that Bill somehow transformed himself into Lou Ferrigno-

 

Lastly we have Wonder Woman and that first honor actually belongs to a truly awful 1967 TV show starring Ellie Wood Walker that was taken in a campy sitcomy direction. Thankfully, things were destined to get better seven years later—but not by much!

No comparison to my favorite (even though Gal Gadot does a pretty solid job) Lynda Carter was the total bomb-

Our latest Super Hero, and this one is a ‘Man’s Man’ is, drum roll please Tyler, ‘Mr. America’ Swedburg,


Lord help me!

Have You Ever Had the, “I’m In Over My Head Feeling”?

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‘Imposter Syndrome’

Understanding and Responding to

On March 29th, 2018 I attended a lunch/keynote at Michigan State University, it was greatness!  The topic was talking about the ‘Imposter Syndrome’ and was presented by Dr. Valerie Young,  who is an expert on this topic.
Below are my notes from the lunch.
Success can separate you from people/ Women and men have different levels of competence Evals/ women much higher, 75% of people have this feeling at some point in their life!
Quote-
“I am burdened by great potential”
Linus

Formula for change-Info + Insight + Tools
Pauline Clancy & Suzanne Ives- Imposter “Syndrome”
Talk our success up to luck and other things/due to many other factors/and the incredible amount of reasons and creativity to not give ourselves credit, other than the real,
Problem is we worry about being “Found Out”/ very common
WHY!
Perfection/for kids, praise is like oxygen
Scholarly isolation
Highly competitive/tenure process/ highly educated environment
Every organization has their own culture/hierarchy/putting things into context
Pressure to represent/ Being the youngest/ Being the oldest
Stereotypes about competence/you are not as good, or not good enough
Adequate
Competence Bias/Ingrained/this is where Valerie wanted to focus attention
Common source/if you ask for help, people with imposter syndrome feel shame
Perfectionist – plenty of room for shame/ perceived failure
Natural genius –
Soloist-
Expert-
‘Super’ person-
Keep the hunger, but let go of the shame of ‘not knowing’
Formula for change-Info + Insight + Tools
  1. Become aware of you imposter/confidence PATTERN (Whenever I am in a situation where). I usually experience feelings of. And then the negative inner voice starts yapping, What do I typically do,,, example//qualifiers
  2. Recognize imposter behaviors-Coping strategies,,,, Unconscious/fly under radar/safer//procrastination///never start,,,, or finish///// Over working/over preparing to cover supposed ineptness
  3. Understand what you’re getting out of this/what does this help me avoid//what does this protect me from///what did it help me get
  4. At what cost/what will happen if I never change this pattern//what price am I paying///What opportunities and what experiences might I miss out on?
These all work, but at a price!!!!
Talk about the Cure-3 things
  • Show up
  • You cannot share your way out of imposter feelings
  • Normalize imposter feelings, there are 70% of people who feel that way,,, Talk yourself down faster,,imposter ‘moments’ not ‘life’
  • Reframe- stop feeling like an imposter, stop thinking like one, keep getting better, constructive feedback is a gift, give me information that will make me better,,,,no one wins them all,,,,,failures and setbacks happen—it’s what you do with them///Non-imposters know—smart is highly overrated//Always a learning curve///the more you do anything, you’ll get betterment////No one excels at everything!!!!!///Winging it can be a skill/you cannot know everything ahead of time-or ever////its ok to say, “I don’t know”/////Reframe——-FEAR!///Keep saying “I am excited////your body does not know the difference between fear and excitement
  • Keep going——-REGARDLESS!//// everyone loses when bright people play small

Risk Being Seen

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In every relationship, whether with lovers, friends, family, professional peers, and strangers alike, we are offered the opportunity to be seen. The risks that are taken and the worthiness that is cultivated every time that we allow ourselves to be vulnerable are writing our story of victory or victim! My thoughts go to many of the books that I have read on the subject of vulnerability and the lack of it that exists in our culture today.  My question is do you feel that space within that longs to be felt, and constantly asks to be seen, and do you allow it to come forth? In my humble opinion, I believe that our mental, physical and spiritual health depend on it. The gift is not just our own, but everyone that we come in contact with gets the best that we can be, the truth of who we are, and this will create a life that feels aligned and purposeful. Relationships change, confidence rises, and courage roars! 

 

The pressures of this culture and the mass marketing message is that we are not enough, we are too this or not enough that, and this message alone can keep us dimmed and stuck in self doubt. If you look deeply, and spend a few moments  connecting to your inner voice, it is likely that the chatter is less then empowering and loving.  Working with clients over the years to shift their current experiences, we often sit looking at each other as they come to realize that their greatest enemy is themselves.  That inner critic that keeps saying that you are not ______enough, fill in the blank (pretty, skinny, smart, successful, wealthy, deserving, etc.) .  I am here, right now, to tell you that it is not real and that you can begin to show up and heal this issue, with honesty and courage.  As I began to grow my own awareness to my own fears of beings seen, I had many moments of terror! That terror was there to teach me that I was scared of being seen, being criticized and being ridiculed. It taught me that I was being brave and that this new way of expressing my truth was courageous. It was there to show me that my fear was suffocating me. It was there to remind me that no matter what anyone else thought of me, I had to trust myself and show up.  My whole life depends on it now, as I could not accept anything less with this understanding. My inner critic will show up, but no longer does it have any power over me.  I have learned that it’s an old voice of irrational fear.  The realest fear I have now, which motivates me daily, is that I would ever stop risking being seen. 

 We can be honest, courageous, and vulnerable with others when we are able to practice this with ourselves. The willingness to accept that vulnerability and being seen is in fact our path to solid, strong, and valuable relationships is one key. The willingness to know that we are worthy and that we matter is the second key awareness in being truly seen.  The willingness to look at our lives and know that if we are feeling exhaustion, anxiety, fear, unworthy, worry or even feeling physically ill, we do have the capacity to change these experience, one moment at a time.  Every room you walk into, every conversation you enter, every letter you write, every person you encounter, is the perfect space to practice showing up, being authentic, being seen and stepping into the courageous active energy of being loved, or disliked for who you are.  What we choose to do in our moments is what matters the most.  What we choose to express in this world is up to us, and when you look at statistics, the most positive, inspiring, and influential people are those that have dared to showed up, courageously, and have walked their talk, and shared their journeys, because they knew it mattered! 

Take a moment today to look in the mirror and really look at the eyes looking back at you.  This person that is staring at you is dependent on your bravery and your courage.  This person deserves for you to get real about what matters and what doesn’t. This person matters. This person wants you to show up and be seen.  Breathe.

Angela N Jospeh

Wellness & Lifestyle Coach

www.angelanjoseph.com